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  • Writer's pictureMichaela S. Cox

The Expert Says

The Experts say….

Knowledge is power and in our society and culture today there is an extensive, expansive and absorbent beyond measure amount of knowledge to be found everywhere one may turn and in all areas of life. Moreover this is the case considering we live in the era of history and the world of the information age and the internet. Knowledge is enlightening and empowering and opens up worlds to us. In having knowledge and opening up our world to this knowledge there is something called an expert that can be like a helper who guides others through information and knowledge in a specific field or area such as academia (history, literature, English, foreign language, political science, philosophy, geography, sociology, psychology, Mathematics, the Sciences, teaching, medicine, law and numerous others), the medical field, the legal area, religion, education, professions, economics, business, travel, sports, family, relationships among endless other to include parenting. An expert in any of these arenas or fields is defined as someone who is or has a special skill or knowledge in some particular field and has authority in that sphere of knowledge such as a specialist. Knowledge is fundamentally key and an invaluable resource in whatever area a person maybe interested. Although it is evident in our world today that there is an endless and ample supply of people who think of themselves as experts and are offering their expertise to any and everybody who would ask, listen or hear them give it even if unwarranted or explicitly not requested. We as mothers absolutely without a doubt need and can gain much from sound knowledge and information but sometimes to much of anything isn’t a good thing or helpful. I have often thought as a mother that all through the endless sounds bites and choruses of knowledge, information, guidance and counsel offered to me it was and is difficult to hear my own voice, thoughts, opinions and counsel. I wondered how I would sort through the sea of experts and find my own voice and way as the mother to my daughter.

It is true that it is most natural for us as individuals when finding ourselves in a pickle or problem to go seek help and find a solution or answer and often that can be found though information, knowledge and yes experts. I know when I found out I was going to be a mommy and start my journey into motherhood I had endless questions and wanted desperately to find the answers. Some good places for me was the internet, books and friends. There are plenty of sound, wise, well known, recognized, and respected experts or authorities to choose from such as the Dr. Phil., John Rosemond, Dr. James Dobson, Kevin Lenman, Gray Chapman, Gary Smalley among others but these are some I am knowledgable, respect and recommend with among countless other that out there. As a new mommy and as all mommies I know we hear all the time everywhere the experts say this on any and all issues of motherhood and parenting. There is an expert opinion on how much tv time or screen time there should be depending upon the age of child, There are expert opinions on how long to and the benefits of breast fasting. Also there is experts on which type of pumping system is the best, the best formula, the best nipples and bottles and any and every other baby product out there on the market. There are experts who say how and when to potty trains boys and girls. There are experts on the issue of the family bed, which sleeping position is best for babies, the method of getting a baby to sleep through the night and on a schedule such as the Baby Wise program, the Happiest baby on the block system. There is more endless experts on how educate and get your child reading and ready for school. It seems most evident that there is countless experts offering knowledge, information and their expertise on just about any and every aspect of parenting and motherhood imaginable under the parenting and motherhood sun. Also these endless amount of expertise under the motherhood and parenting sun is constantly changing their position on the same issue it’s enough to make you want to scream or pull out your hair. It seems as mothers we are overwhelmed by this engulfing sea that we are swimming and even drowning in this massive sea of knowledge, information, and of the experts and aren’t able tor struggle to come up out of it for air.

Although one of the most invaluable things I have learned and discovered as I started and continued my own journey into motherhood is that absolutely without a doubt the fundamental most important expert and sources of knowledge, information and wisdom was and is me. You are probably most liking thinking at this moment hold on now remember we are virgins in our motherhood and as we journey on as new mommies so how could I or we be experts in anything concerning be a mommy, parenting or motherhood. That is a great question I’m so very glad you asked because here is the secret I learned and discovered and I’ll let you in on it too. I as the one who is mommy to my baby girl is the only one who knows best, what she needs and I am the ultimate expert in my daughter and family. Yes, I have referred to the known experts in the fields of parenting and motherhood to guide me but at the end of the day it is I and only I alone who is the expert in my daughter no one else. I know her inside and out I carried her in me for 10 months and I have been with her for every second of every minute of every hour of every day of her life since she came into my world and I started my journey with her as her mother hand in hand. No one knows my daughter the way I do and better than me. Thus this is the very definition of what it is to be an expert and that makes me the absolute ultimate expert in my daughter and family. Each person, child, mother, family all are different, unique and special thus what is needed from a mommy, for a child and family is going to vary from mother to mother, from child to child , even in the same family and family to family. The experts can’t speak to every special, unique and differing needs of every mommy, child and family. I am the only one who can speak to this for me as a mommy, my daughter and my family. In my own life being disabled, visually impaired and trying to parent and mother a daughter as a disabled individual creates and presents a unique, special and differing set of circumstances for me, my daughter and family from anyone else. Only I can know and can say what is required of me and my family thus making me the expert in what I need to mange my life, my family, to be a mommy and in my journey in motherhood.

There is much freedom to be found as a mommy and knowing I’m the expert and owning and accepting that as the mother of my daughter. I have found that in that knowledge, truth and realization of that it has allowed me to own my role and place as a mommy. I have found that yes as I was and still am in some ways a virgin in motherhood but as I continue on learning, growing in my role and place of mommy I have gained more knowledge, information and experience. Thus as I continue to expand my expertise and become more and more of an expert regarding my motherhood, daughter and family I gain more and more confidence in my abilities as a mommy and in my motherhood. May I always first and foremost find and trust my own voice of information, knowledge, wisdom and expertise as the mommy of my daughter and for my family. May my house of cards of motherhood continue to be built on the strong and firm foundation of my expertise for my daughter and family.

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